zerotohiro | I'll be the watcher of the eternal flame [Eachdraidh IC Contact]

An old prophetic spirit appeared to me and told me to take my people and sail. I was not pleased about it, of course, but he was right in the end. A true seer. He said that my friend was in danger, and he was.

[He follows Hiro's gaze. Gently, he sets his free hand on the boy's shoulder, rubbing a little bit and trying to be comforting.]

You'd only be a bigger target. It's better to let people like me take the hits.

[A pause. His voice lowers.]

You can always, always come to the trading post if you need to. If you feel unsafe, if your friend cannot come to your rescue, then ask me. I can hide you.

I don't think I'll ever really understand spirits and prophecies and who you can really trust. But at least you rescued your friend...right? [Oh god please say he's right, Orc-Dad.

He's still pouting slightly even with the comforting gesture and he knows Thrall has a point, but that doesn't make it any easier to accept.]

Maybe I'd be a bigger target but I'd also be a bigger threat. Isn't that the important part? I want to start teaching people not to mess with us instead of still letting everybody fight for me.

[He looks up again then, a grateful smile in place.] But I know that. Trust me, I will always remember that. But I'm also tired of hiding. I'm going to get better. ["Stronger."] I need to start being able to haul my own weight and keep you guys safe, too.

I thought I had saved him. [Thrall hesitates. He can't lie, won't lie to Hiro.] In truth, Grom saved us all... at the cost of his life.

[Thrall is a bit concerned by Hiro's shift toward wanting to fight. Still, he knows there are good reasons to fight, and there are bad ones.]

Is it simply a matter of being self-reliant, or are you driven by something else? If you fight, you risk your life and you risk your entire world. It isn't a decision to be made lightly.

[...annnnd there goes all of the wind from his sails, so to speak. He's quiet for a minute, shaking his head finally.] I'm sorry. Kinda seems like a pattern, huh?

[He probably has good reasons to be concerned considering it's Hiro and Hiro doesn't quite have the means tor eally fight just yet.]

Why can't it be both? What if I'm being driven by wanting to be self-reliant and also protect everybody here? [...but he pauses, stopping completely as he looks up at Thrall again.] What do you mean the entire world?

I think he wished to atone for the mistakes he made. But... I don't know. He is with the ancestors now. I hope he has found peace.

[It is kind of a problem.

At Hiro's question, something troubled crosses Thrall's expression.]

You don't know... Hiro, listen to me very carefully. [He stops, and he makes sure no one is around. It's just Snowsong, and his keen orcish hearing confirms they're alone. He sets his hands on Hiro's shoulders and looks into his eyes.]

If you lose your shard, you lose your connection to your world. You know that. But it also means that your world dies.

There can always be one last thing that changes your fate. If he sacrificed himself to save you guys and he's with the ancestors? I don't doubt he's found it.

['Sort of like Tadashi', he thinks, but doesn't say out loud. He stands a little taller, not breaking eye contact as Thrall speaks before it clicks. The world dies. Of course. Of course it does, why hadn't he caught onto that sooner? If the Void was threatening to take over and take the lives of everyone in the Drabwurld, and if death meant losing your shard and losing your shard meant losing your connection to your home world then why wouldn't that mean the same fate much earlier? He's a little horrified by the prospect, and at the same time he remembers something Morla said at the audience about the Shuck and what will happen if they don't stop the Seelie. The destruction of everything until nothing's left to destroy.]

Who told you that? [It's a good question, but it's still clear that he firmly believes it. This isn't something Thrall's telling him just to scare him. This is something he needs to know. But so many of his feelings depend on Thrall's answer.]

Hn.

[The wound still hurts and he doesn't want to think about Grom when he's basically standing in his position. Making mistakes, trying to teach someone younger that he might call 'little brother'... It hits way too close to home.]

Someone I trust with my life. [Considering it was told to him under a spell that prevents eavesdropping, he's pretty sure it's legitimate information.] I was told many things, not all of which I am obliged to share. You must believe me-- not as your chieftain or your teacher, but as your friend.

Fighting is a last resort.

Understandable. [But at the same time it only makes him want to ask why. It makes him want to seek answers all over again, even if they're ones he may not like.

If fighting's really a last resort...did the others know? Did the others know that their worlds would end if they were killed in action?] Why don't more people know about this then? Isn't that kinda important?

If people knew, they wouldn't want to fight. There were other courts besides the Seelie and Unseelie, once. Over thousands of years, the courts have decimated the others and taken their shards. That means they've murdered countless worlds along with their people. The amount of lives lost is... unimaginable.

The monarchs will tell you that no price is too great for victory, but... if we are supposed to be fighting to preserve the worlds we have now, then killing the Seelie means destroying what we're trying to protect.

[Snowsong pads around in a circle and waits for them in a grassy place up ahead.]

We're beset upon from both sides and the third path remains shrouded to me. Still, you deserve to know what the consequences are.

Edited 2015-06-02 01:41 (UTC)

This doesn't make any sense. [There's something wrong. He's not sure who's withholding information, or possibly who's skewing information to win favor but everything he's hearing just doesn't add up. He can believe that there used to be other courts and he can believe the amount of lives lost is unimaginable.

But how can their goals make sense if the rest of that is true? It's a lot to think about. Thrall's successfully knocked him out of that desire to fight...for now.]

So really what you're saying is we need to find a way to guide more people to the third path before we end up destroying all of the worlds anyway. Right? [It still doesn't add up, but he's focusing on this one piece at a time.]

[Thrall lets him go and follows his wolf.]

All rulers all have their secrets, Hiro-- this I know well. The corrupt ones lie and cheat to keep their people in check. [He doesn't, personally, but he does have spies in places because wars aren't only fought on the front lines.] They have for lived thousands of years. Do you really think their sanity is intact? If they were human once, mortal and feeling like us, they have forgotten. Reul's actions have more than demonstrated that.

[Yeah, he's pissed.]

Yes. But... there is no third path available. Not right now. Not without risking the lives of everyone who dreams of peace. Those who might have been neutral have every reason to hide now, and I do not blame them. The barest sniff of discontent in either court can result in death or... undeath. As you know.

[He comes to a stop beside Snowsong. His expression is dark even as he pets her ears.]

I do not want you to be made into an example. You are worth so much more than that.

There are way, way too many secrets in this place. [Not that it surprises him. Once Thrall releases his shoulders he turns to follow, but his head is craned up to look at his friend instead of the path they're walking.] You really think the monarchs are just crazy?

[That seems a little...well. He's not sure. It's a bunch of conflicting messages in his head, things he's not explictly explaining but things he'll have to piece together. Maybe talk to Jason...or somebody not Jason. Somebody with an in-between...Clarke, perhaps.]

I'm not exactly looking to be made into an example either. [Though he sure does keep throwing himself into stupid shit.] But it's also part of why I want to keep fighting. I need them to believe that I'm not going to be swayed or whatever. But if I'm not ready, I can't fight. So...what else am I supposed to do now? [And here he stops to wait, hand coming up to pet Snowsong's snout idly.]

I do. Living for too long tends to... fracture the mind. I've seen it many times on my world. I fear to think what would have become of the Horde if someone immortal were in charge. [He shakes his head. He's furious, and it shows in his voice as his tones become gravelly and deep.] There is no reason, none, to slaughter someone and then deny their spirit peace. It was a show of power and authority meant to frighten others into submission. He tortured that poor girl.

Reul has shown complete disregard for the natural cycle-- the balance of life and death itself-- and for that he cannot be forgiven.

[He growls in discontent. Snowsong whines petulantly, but then Hiro pets her nose and she's happy to lick all over his hands and face.]

Can't you contribute in other ways than the front lines? Use your clever mind and build things, then stand behind them. Or you can focus on mending wounds with those healer's hands you have.

There is always a way.

People in our world don't tend to live that long...it's rare for people to live to be over a hundred but even then some of them are still really, really smart. [He understands Thrall's anger and he'd have to agree that yes, Reul was a bit...much and the entire audience was only a show of his authority. However he doesn't say anything to agree or disagree. He's still a little wary of speaking about the politics of this world until he understands better. This is the time to listen, not argue.

He makes a face then, partially at the question and partially at Snowsong licking him again. He doesn't mind the latter nearly as much as the former though and he's looking at his hands, considering for a moment.]

Thrall. Even if I build things and stand behind them that makes me just as responsible as if I were out on the front lines fighting anyway. [It's something he's repeating from someone else, but also something he's really given thought to. While he plans on doing that as well...] And I need something big to show Morla and Reul that I'm not putting all of us in danger. Kinda like what Jason did. [Not exactly like Jason did because he's not nearly as much of a fighter as the older man, but a big gesture.] If I want to make myself a smaller target, gotta start there first.

I don't doubt that. Humans live the same on mine, and orcs as well. [He thinks Hiro is being too nice about Reul, honestly. It's clear to Thrall that the man's a tyrant and he needs to be brought down. Morla... less so, but he's turning more and more toward other options the longer he's in the Drabwurld.]

It puts you further from danger. You are not made for the front lines no matter how much you feel you need to prove yourself to them.

[He sighs deeply. This is an argument he just isn't going to win, is he? He sits in the grass rather unceremoniously, setting the bag of food aside. He's... not really hungry after this conversation.]

... I know I can't stop you, so I won't waste my breath trying. I only want you to consider what you've learned.

[He bows his head, almost a little shamed that he's frustrated Thrall with the conversation before following suit and settling on the grass, drawing his knees closer to his chest and wrapping his arms around them.]

...sorry. I know you're right. [Of course, the definition of "right" can be dependent on any given day. Thrall definitely has a point though. A good point. A valid point, especially.] Ever feel like you've learned so much but you've also learned nothing at all? I've learned a lot but the pieces still aren't fitting right. I just need to work on new projects.

[He looks up then, tentative to ask but curious all the same.] What are you doing with the trading post now that Reul threatened to kill all of us?

[Snowsong flops down on Thrall's left side, her big white ruff beneath his elbow as an armrest.]

Sorry for what? Your stubbornness? [He smiles around his tusks.] I would be lying if I said I was any better. As long as you understand that you are fighting for more than just yourself, then that is all I ask.

[He takes a nice warm bun out of the bag and offers it to Hiro.]

I know you will do the right thing when the time comes. What that is, I do not know yet... but I trust you. I also know you will make mistakes, as I did-- but that will not change your heart.

[There's a slightly bemused look at that, but he leans forward to take the bun anyway. He doesn't bite into it right away, settling to hold it as he mulls over that thought. Of course he's stubborn and of course he understands it's now a much, much bigger picture. Jason had recently scolded him for not paying attention to what the world needs and only focusing on what he wanted. It's the same lesson, just presented differently.]

Yeah, well, those mistakes will probably get me killed if I'm not careful. [He realizes that, and he finally picks apart a piece of the bun to shove it into his mouth.] Friend of mine recently told me just that. That we won't know what the right thing is until we're in that moment. I think that's what scares me most about everything. Back home it didn't matter because my friends and I were a team and we knew mostly what we were doing. Even disappearing to save Abigail...I knew it was never a mistake. It was always the right thing even if we weren't sure we were gonna come back. With this though...I still don't really know.

[He shakes his head, shoving more into his mouth just to shut up.] But I bet you're not the only one who's pissed. Things are going to start shifting again.

Your friend is wise. [He mulls over his own bun, though he splits it in half rather than picking at it like Hiro does. After a moment, he gives half to Snowsong.] Sometimes we do not know if it was the right choice until much later. The right thing is not always the easiest one.

[There's a light eyebrow at the language, but he doesn't deny it. He's... more interested in what Hiro is saying.]

You risked your life to save someone?

[Didn't his brother do that? Oh, Hiro.]

Edited 2015-06-12 20:49 (UTC)

He's also kind of a jerk. [But the grin should be enough of a hint that Hiro doesn't mind at all. Joshua is...really important to him, even if he won't actually openly admit that.] But he's been around for a long time, so I kinda can see his point. [His eyes shift to look at Snowsong instead, watching the wolf sniff at the bun herself.] Kinda makes you wonder if there's ever gonna be cases where you'll never know if you made the right choice.

[He wonders if Tadashi could be resting easy if he knew his choice was in vain. But the question causes his head to jerk up and a guilty little look crosses his face. Whoops.]

Oh...um...didn't...I ever tell you that? [Well, the apple certainly doesn't fall far from the tree in this case.] Her name's Abigail Callaghan. For a long time everyone thought she was gone. When we found her though, we knew we had to bring her back.

Edited 2015-06-12 22:42 (UTC)

Sometimes. [Thrall has a bit of experience in that regard. Lately it's been more and more that way, but he doesn't want to shove all his insecurities on the teenager. He's fine, right now.]

No, you did not. [He doesn't scold Hiro or even sound disappointed. He knows Hiro takes time to open up.] That was very brave of you... and foolish, as you already know.

Was she kidnapped?

[There's a heavy sigh, thinking of how to respond without elaborating so much that it might be overwhelming.]

No, not exactly. Abigail was part of this project back home...Silent Sparrow. It was meant to be the first successful portal travel but the project wasn't ready and the portal was unstable. The head of the project went through with it anyway and because of that the portal collapsed on itself and Abigail got stuck for a long time. Everyone thought she was gone forever.

...the other portal was revived recently and Baymax realized she was still in there. So...you can see why we had to go save her. She was in hypersleep that whole time and came out of it when I pulled her out.

[There's a very distinct word choice. "We" had to save her. "I" pulled her out. He doesn't draw attention to it though, continuing with the story.] She's okay now. I don't know what's going to happen to her now because her father was arrested, but she's okay.

[Poor Hiro. He needs more friends that aren't medieval era dumbasses. Still, he understands the concept of portal travel. He is, after all, best friends with a mage.]

You had to-- because no one else would. Is that what you mean?

[Hiro really is like his brother. Thrall's expression softens, and he reaches out to pat Hiro's back.] She will have to start over, I suppose. It is not the worst of fates.

I cannot say I would have acted differently in that situation. I wonder if that makes me a poor influence.

Edited 2015-06-21 21:47 (UTC)

[There's a short nod.] Someone had to help. That someone had to be us...we were the only ones who could after everything that happened.

[In a way, it's a lot like what Tadashi did. On the other hand, it's not like Tadashi at all (in Hiro's opinion. But that's a whole other can of worms.) He just flashes a semi-grateful smile in return. At least Thrall's handling this with ease and it's for that reason he continues going through the motions like this doesn't still bother him.]

I dunno about being a poor influence. I would have done it anyway without influence. [A shrug. Not true. Tadashi instilled something in him thanks to his death and they both know it.] But what bothers me is that the same thing can't happen here, you know? I can't do those things for people here.

[Tadashi really did leave his legacy in Hiro. Looking at him now, Thrall can see how he's gotten taller in more ways than one.]

I guarantee that you have helped people more than you realize-- whether it be from friendship, gestures of kindness, or hard work. Salvation comes in many forms. It isn't always a grand, selfless gesture that captures the attention of the whole world.

[He passes out a bit more of the lunch-- garlic-stuffed baked potatoes wrapped in cloth, pieces of poultry. And of course he gives part of his share to Snowsong, because... he's a dog owner, basically.]

I'll be the watcher of the eternal flame [Eachdraidh IC Contact]

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