BREAKDOWN
PLANSBreakdown of things I hope to accomplish at various points in the year:
✖ I'm hoping to use this timeskip to develop Hiro's CR and also have him get involved in the Unseelie aspect of the Drabwurld, specifically trying to get involved with the R&D department that Saber's setting up. Update - post-timeskip: busy with R&D stuff from April until about Yule, then disappeared to fulfill the task given by Black Shuck.
✖ I want him to help with the spire projects (specifically spire 10 thanks to his quest) and also spend a lot of time at the Station, building technology that will work outside of the station that he can sell for profit/possibly be building things for Lumina's chocobo ranch. (Also building cat toys for Shijima. This is important.) Update - post-timeskip: the team of natives and sorcerers Hiro recruited during his quest helped finish Spire 10 and he spent very little time at the Station during timeskip. He built a few things for Lumina and Shijima.
✖ He'll also be building up his magical ability by acting as Lemina's Junior Premier, learning how to control his magic and also recruiting for her. He's going to spend a lot of time to effectively wield his magic. Going to learn how to use his crossbow too. Also depending, he may be learning some mild sorcery from Loki. One of his boons will be healing magic so he'll be attempting to be Tadashi be Baymax help that way. Update - post-timeskip: After their fight in June, Hiro hung back on the Guild and just acted as Junior Premier whenever Lemina needed him. He had a few students he checked in with but was largely hands-off while also learning how to control his fire magic and his wind magic. Learned to use a dagger instead. Has mastered level 1 illusion spellwork from Loki and will be looking into runic magic.
✖ If he behaves and proves himself, he will be playing a very large part in the R&D that Saber's setting up in Spire 10 acting as the Head of Project. Once that starts he will begin questioning how to make off-locket communication devices and teaming up with Rin, most likely. Update - post-timeskip: Saber named him head of project at the end of March 2701. When Rin didn't teach him right away, he circumvented her and learned to make the devices himself (accomplished by June 2701.) He's been working and will continue to work with Rin to further develop their partnership and create more tech to sell.
✖ Notable dates include a certain unhappy anniversary in the spring (sometime in the first part of April) that will cause him to basically shut down, along with his 15th birthday (headcanoned August 22nd) Update - post-timeskip: Both of these were acknowledged.
✖ CR-wise he'll be going to extreme lengths to keep in contact with Jason Todd and Loki until the three go their separate ways over the timeskip (possibly developing a friendship with Billy Kaplan via Loki as well?) Around April he'll most likely meet Joshua Kiryu and learn some very important things about him and gain a troll-guardian. Around March most likely he'll also meet Leo Valdez while unfreezing people via fire magic (tentative?) and also he will officially meet Nico di Angelo and soothe the tensions between him and Lumina, who he will also occasionally pop in and visit. In July he'll take a month off to go explore the northlands with Thrall. He'll be in contact with various people he's assisted so far and just let them know he's available if necessary but otherwise he'll be mostly exploring on his own. I want to also use this time to send him to some of the neutral territory (maybe Redgate) and also maybe make some Seelie CR since right now he kinda hates all of them. Update - post-timeskip: Jason and Hiro have had a turbulent year that ended with them splitting up for good until Hiro gathers the nerve to crawl back and apologize. He's developed very close friendships with Loki, Billy, Shijima, Eren, Lumina, Lemina, Thrall, and Howard. He's developed an extremely close friendship with Nico di Angelo as well and has since realized he has romantic feelings for him that he's yet to act on. Joshua Kiryu continues to act as a guardian angel and one person Hiro can be about 95% open and honest with and receive real answers. He developed a friendship with Leo Valdez as he assisted him thawing the Station in March and they spoke of developing secret meeting places during Samhain, along with talks of Leo's apprenticeship. In July he explored the northlands with Thrall to heal the earth and during Yule Thrall made him a member of the Frostwolf Clan. During Samhain, the Black Shuck sent Hiro on a mission with Nico to lay the dead to rest so January-April has been spent traveling.
✖ Other people to meet/build CR with: Rin, Eren, Sakura, Katsa, Shijima, Vol'jin, Saber, Sakura, Merida, Ellie, Colette. Update - post-timeskip: Has built better CR with Rin, Eren, Shijima, Saber, Merida, Ariadne, Colette, Prince Edgar and Katsa. Has met Sakura, and Ellie. Has also met and built decent with Grell Sutcliffe, Wan, Johnny Storm, Teresa, Clarke Griffin, and Lia de Beaumont.
SUMMARY OF KNOWN DETAILS
So far Hiro's only participated in the battle and also tried to play with the jabberwock. Also will soon discover he cannot, in fact, rebuild a special robot friend and will be very upset about that. Otherwise whatever! Update - post-timeskip: Haaaaaaaaaa.
SPRING 2701
SPRING IN 2,701 (Mar, Apr, May)
- MARCH - The new King of Birds, the Roc, brings late snowstorms across the drabwurld; shardbearers must combat its magic to un-freeze each other, natives, and whole areas. Monarchs are still around and boons still occur.
- HIRO'S MARCH PLANS - Hiro will be using his newly learned fire magic to help unfreeze people (team up and meet Leo? Also team up with Merida at some point.) He will also be spending time between Spire 10 and the Station, most likely trying to set up residence in both places. He will also be recruiting for Lemina's magic guild and attempting to learn more about the R&D sanction of the Unseelie that will be housed in Spire 10. Update - post-timeskip: All true save for teaming up with Merida. Hiro worked with several people this month during the freeze (Leo, Johnny, Howard, Wan, Lemina, Katsa, etc.)
- APRIL - Shardbearers shall be struck at various moments by the sound of harp-playing which inspires distractingly, disablingly intense and wild emotions, but be unable to determine the source! Shardbearers will discover that they can follow the sound only in their dreams to the dream-image of a harp which magically plays itself. Smashing the harp in their dreams will disable the spell which affects their waking moments. This is the last month monarchs will be visibly around and which boons will occur.
- HIRO'S APRIL PLANS - Hiro will be hearing the harp and stuck struggling with keeping said-emotions under wraps and will probably explode on someone. Once he figures out how to smash the harp it will be done so. Update - post-timeskip: Had a near panic-attack about his harp and had a loooong talk with Joshua about how the harps worked and also a long talk about death and morality after Hiro smashed the harp. Spent the entire month of April locked away doing research and hiding from everyone/ignoring his CR.
- MAY - Golden swans will migrate to the mainland from the southern coast, devouring newly-planted crops and seeds; slaying them turns them into solid gold swan figurines. (also the Monarchs will be gone, lockets stop working, people opting out go to sleep.)
- HIRO'S PLANS FOR MAY - Once he finds out that the swan figures can become money, he'll most likely be taking his newly-booned cat and chasing/terrorizing the swans to get money. When Mochi won't have any of it, Hiro will team up with Shijima to kill swans and get money. Update - post-timeskip: The first of May was spent hunting down Jason Todd. Afterwards he made his way to Lumina's farm and started building automatic feeding stations for her chocobos. He also hunted swans with Shijima without Mochi (did not boon the cat.) Also researched in the background and worked on his communication devices. Worked with the Guild when he could.
SUMMER 2701
SUMMER IN 2,701 (Jun, Jul, Aug)
- JUNE - It becomes clear that the areas the Jabberwock spent too much time in will grow nothing and have become barren; includes areas around Caer Glaem, the Cothromach, the Station, other parts of the map. Shardbearers may attempt to heal these areas.
Treun holds its famous summer tourney! The purse is 5,000 gold marks for each of these competitions: Magical Duelling, Mounted Joust, and the Melee! The competitions go over the day, featuring many famed individuals participating in secret, and the revels continue over nights. A mod post will go up for this event.
- HIRO'S JUNE PLANS- He's not going to participate in the tourney but he IS going to set up a giant betting pool for non-participants to get involved. Since a lot of his friends are also competing he will most likely spread a few rumors about the stats of the fighters to mess with the odds. His healing plans will take place in July instead. Update - post-timeskip: Betting pool still happened and he almost got his ass kicked for it. Nico di Angelo saved him and his friendship with the boy started. Also handed out communicators to his very close CR. And also found out Lemina was offering the Guild to Seelie shardbearers, got pissed, and stopped talking to her. Hiro's work with the Guild went on pause.
- JULY - Violent anti-shardbearer demonstration in Daonna results in the hanging of a dozen Seelie and Unseelie shardbearers in the city square. Whispers insist that ancient shardbearer Martin Maskmaker is behind the clever fox-masks which magically hide the identities of the killers and help them leave no trace.
- HIRO'S JULY PLANS-If Hiro gets IC word he's going to start trying to work on solving the mystery despite not having clues about the killers. However he will be spending the entire month of July traveling with Thrall into the northlands to assess the damage of the area and start trying to heal them on their own. Update - post-timeskip: Did not do anything about the anti-shardbearer demonstrations but instead spent the whole month with Thrall traveling to the northlands to heal the destruction from the jabberwock.
- AUGUST - Leathann's Festival of Lights is the second week in August, a curious local celebration timed to the arrival of fireflies which will this year mark the induction of the new Oracle; overnight the boats which comprise the Water Market all seem to have vanished, and natives float candles on the river out to sea and let paper lanterns fly, while in the distance the Tower of the Oracle glows golden through day and night.
- HIRO'S AUGUST PLANS- Depending on if he can get there, he might go down and check it out because pretty lights and fireflies and stuff. Around the 19th or so, he'll be organizing a beach trip with friends as a guise to celebrate not only his birthday (August 22nd) but also Jason Todd's (August 16th.) Update - post-timeskip: Came back from his journey with Thrall and immediately was whisked away by Nico to Leathann for the Festival of Lights. Celebrated his/Jason's birthday on August 20th. Background research. He apologized to Lemina this month as well. Guild work is still less but he's helping where he can. R&D research goes back into full-swing at the end of August.
AUTUMN 2701
FALL IN 2,701 (Sept, Oct, Nov)
- SEPTEMBER - The magical power which allows shardbearers to understand Drabbish and each other goes haywire; affected characters will be heard speaking their native tongue! All their writing, however, will still be seen as Drabbish. The annual Treun wreath festival! Harvests are very poor, but the spectacle and scope of the dancing, grain-giving, and public drunkenness are as riotously whole-hearted as ever. The festival ends in drunken bread-riots, however, and fires set in the garden district. The public calls for Fortuna to abdicate his position
- HIRO'S SEPTEMBER PLANS- Language shenanigans! Let's see how many people he no longer understands. Hiro speaks and understands English and Japanese fluently. No other plans thus-far. Update - post-timeskip: He pantomimed stuff with Wan to learn meditation methods better! He also started learning how to write and translate things in Ancient Greek for a certain present for a certain demigod. Month was spent heavily doing research and development and mostly stuck to the Spire save for his time with Wan at the Station near the end of September.
- OCTOBER - 25-30 - SAMHAIN! Sun does not rise; characters can go wherever they please; Black Shuck makes another appearance; giant party on the Cathraon. Mods will post logs for this.
- HIRO'S OCTOBER PLANS- - Samhain! Hiro's going to attend Samhain and probably get into a lot of trouble because it's a giant party. He's going to try to approach Black Shuck with Nico di Angelo and force Eren Yeager into a suit because it's hilarious. He'll probably also be easier to trick into dancing with his CR and he'll be mingling around to meet new people as well. October otherwise is completely open and planless. Update - post-timeskip: Early October he researched blood granite with Edgar, but otherwise pretty much nothing about this has changed other than the fact that approaching Shuck was a Bad Idea and he and Nico were tasked with traveling the Drabwurld to lay the dead to rest. Hiro's secrets about Nico were revealed to Loki after he stopped the fight between Nico and Lumina. Loki also gave him his first kiss to prove it was no big deal. Hiro pushed him in the face a lot. Also began planning secret clubs/safehouses with Leo Valdez and made a lot of new connections.
- NOVEMBER - Inmates from a magical island prison-colony of Leathann have escaped, and some manage to reach the mainland and begin causing havoc! The government of Leathann posts rewards for the return of these criminals, dead or alive. Many are legitimately dangerous mages and sorcerers; others are simply individuals who are debtors to the state and couldn't pay their taxes!
- HIRO'S NOVEMBER PLANS- He may try to team up with some people to go after some of the criminals but for the most part he'll be using the month of November to research High Queen Morla and complete a quest for Ariadne. Update - post-timeskip: First two weeks of November alternated between working on the quest for Ariadne and researching stuff for R&D. The end of November was spent with Lumina traveling to Spire 9's city to work with the vampires to make copies of her chocobo books.
WINTER 2701
WINTER IN 2,701/2,702 (Dec, Jan, Feb)
- DECEMBER - YULE! Giant hunting party with both courts trying to catch the White Hart! Mods will post logs for this.
- HIRO'S DECEMBER PLANS- He's going to wind up building an army of snowmen and one very special Snowmax at the Station if he can get there. Otherwise no real plans. He'll be celebrating Yule/Christmas and provide presents to a lot of his close CR. Update - post-timeskip: Haha he basically exchanged presents with people, argued with Nico until Nico agreed to take him on Shuck's task, ventured on an overnight trip with Thrall to become a tiny Frostwolf, argued with Jason about Nico and cut their ties temporarily and ditched the spire to head out. Last month he researched stuff for R&D. Last month he actively worked with the Guild.
- JANUARY - Caer Scima is at last entirely rebuilt, and grander than ever!
- HIRO'S JANUARY PLANS- Definitely going to return to CS to see how it's been rebuilt. Otherwise he's pretty quiet this month. Update - post-timeskip: Definitely did not return to CS and definitely did not remain quiet this month. Spent the month traveling and training with Nico.
- FEBRUARY -Parrais holds its Ostara Feast! A local celebration of and competition in the arts, chalks harvested from the coast are all dyed and given to local children the full week before, and the whole city is mostly covered in their murals. By the feast's end, several famous elven artisans and musicians are found with their throats slashed.
- HIRO'S FEBRUARY PLANS- He's going to end up bouncing off to Redgate with Billy Kaplan to crash in Loki's dorm and also try to break into the fancy-schmancy library. May also end up meeting a handful of the Seelie in Redgate. Update - post-timeskip: Went to Redgate with Billy to research more/bond with Billy/crash in on Loki. Billy and Loki figured out his romantic feelings toward a certain son of Hades that Hiro adamantly denied. Hiro gained access to the Redgate library for research. In addition, he traveled to Mair and met Grell who spoke with him of death, magic, and runes as she helped him with the next leg of his task for Shuck.
SPRING 2702
SPRING IN 2,702 (Mar, Apr)
- MARCH - The skeletons of unburied soldiers killed in battle begin to rise, devouring whatever living beasts or people they come upon until their skulls are struck off.
- HIRO'S MARCH PLANS- Gonna double-check that this isn't Nico's work and then use a combination of magic and other skills to kill the skeletons. Update - post-timeskip: Rejoined Nico! This probably was tied into their initial task anyway. Also met Jason again at the end of the month and it went as poorly as one would expect. Jason told Hiro how to fix it ("come home", basically) and Hiro shied away from the idea.
- APRIL - Great numbers of imps and fairies begin to go missing in both castles, to the point where many everyday tasks go unfinished!
- HIRO'S APRIL PLANS- Start devising ways to accomplish the daily tasks with inventions while hunting for the missing imps. Update - post-timeskip: He's lost Jason and it's that time of year again. During Yule he set up a meeting with Joshua on the anniversary of the harp-smashing so they could chat and review everything wrong with the world. He also had a friend-date with Merida where the same sort of things were discussed. Lastly, he received a quest from the Unseelie monarchs just as he was getting ready to go find Jason to apologize one last time.
- MAY - End of timeskip.
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zerotohiro) wrote2014-01-31 08:35 pm
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Saying I'm not allowed to say no doesn't automatically mean you're right.
[Scowling at Hiro. Then he looks over at Loki, a touch apologetic and slightly wary. He's already been attacked once tonight and he really doesn't want another one to happen.]
...We haven't disrupted anything, have we?
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[ Loki gives as advice more than a scolding. he's sure that their goal isn't really to get caught. from dealing with Hiro, he has a feeling that this could end very badly. if it isn't starting to already.
as much as Hiro reminds him of a certain younger self, he's not a god, and he lacks certain resources. Jason wasn't wrong when he said that he may get himself killed. on another level Loki always believed Hiro capable. a little push and pull to that duality left Loki a little curious. ]
Is this where you've been going?
[ he asks all too lightly.
caught red handed, Hiro. ]
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[He meant to keep up a pointed look, but then Loki continues. Whatever he'd been expecting Loki to say? It wasn't that. It definitely wasn't that and the look Loki receives in return sort of openly betrays everything he's thinking from that one little sentence. He's busted. He's so busted and he's confused how Loki found out, a little betrayed that Loki apparently knew and didn't tell him that he knew, and mostly worried about what's going to come next. Who else knows? Does Jason know? Saber? How screwed is he?
There's also the fact that without realizing it he's shifting over just slightly to put himself between Loki and Nico. Just in case. He doesn't think Loki's going to do anything (actually, he knows) but he can't be too careful.
What matters is the fact that Loki knows and now he has to make sure to satisfy his curiosity enough that he doesn't get either of them in trouble. Neither confirming nor denying, he looks at Nico again.]
This is Loki. You've...probably heard of him because of everything. ["Everything" being a fancy way of saying "because you're part-god." He's also taking care not to provide Nico's name. That's up to Nico to decide.]
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Maybe not, but.... [He trails off to sigh in frustration.] We'll talk about it later.
[It would be in poor taste to have this argument in front of Loki, especially if he's at all friends with Hiro.
...Turns out this is a wise decision. He blinks. While he's not at all surprised that Hiro's kept him from the Unseelie friends he has, just on account of the fact that Nico is Seelie and had been involved in tearing down Caer Scima, he is surprised to find himself face-to-face with a god of another pantheon.]
Like, Norse god of mischief? [This would be so much cooler if this was the time to fanboy about it. After a moment of hesitation, he decides to state his name.] I'm Nico. Sorry you had to hear that.
[And that Nico's meeting Loki in the middle of an argument with Hiro. Not the best first impression he's made, but hey. He's also made worse first impressions.]
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Totally like the Norse god of mischief. And lies, chaos, etcetera, if we want to throw a few more into the mix. [ he holds up a hand in a small wave. ] All proper greetings exchanged.
[ he makes no move against Nico. even if he wanted to, this is the Shuck's holiday, and he wasn't about to paint himself with a target. forgetting all that unpleasantness was definitely in the agenda. ]
Though I'm finding myself a teensy bit curious. What were you arguing about, anyway?
[ nah, he'll just be nosy. ]
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Oh god. There are way too many things to process and part of him kind of feels like he's going to throw up and part of him kind of just wants to drag Nico off somewhere else and part of him's trying to say this isn't a big deal because it's Shuck's holiday but it goes beyond that. It goes back until at least February when he first spoke to the boy, June when he first saw him.
Shit.]
Yeah…that's him. [He echoes sort of weakly even though Loki's taken over. He braces himself though, tilting his chin up to look Loki in the face but not quite meeting his eyes.] It's not important, apparently. [Thanks, Nico.] Other than the fact I can't make my own decisions and I'm not allowed to do things based on how I feel now? [A shrug. If he can act his way out of this, maybe the damage will be minimal.
He'll apologize to Nico later of course, but first thing's first.]
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If he can avoid being a prisoner of war and going through Hell again, then better to swallow that bitter pill than risk something worse happening.]
The Black Shuck gave me--us the task to lay the dead to rest. The ones who suffered violent deaths or can't cope with the fact that they're dead. It's to atone for something I did.
[He gives Hiro a brief, pointed look.]
Which is why I can't ask you to come with me. Not to mention, Hiro, you don't have anything that'll even touch a ghost, let alone destroy one if it attacks you.
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actually, he knows the answer to that one. it hasn't exactly slowed down, and Loki doubts it will anytime soon. on one hand, he's close to certain that Nico's a Seelie—on the other, he remembers an echo of himself, and the importance that friendship brought to ... that him. to that Loki, worlds were risked to save his friends. or friend, at the time. here they didn't choose their sides, their sides chose them with all the blurred lines in between.
there's a raised brow to Hiro as Nico speaks. he's not judging, but there's certainly a level of "you did this" in it. ]
You've both certainly got yourselves into something. [ but hey, that little Loki did worse than this. but, well, that little Loki was also a god. ] I'd have a tendency to agree with him. [ there's a point to Nico, and then he holds up a finger. ] But ...
[ he doesn't look like he likes saying this, and there's a faintly apologetic look to Nico. ] If the task was appointed to both of you, there may be retribution for not carrying it out as the Shuck wishes. Let's not dig a deeper hole, so to say. Hiro may find himself on the wrong side of a divine being with a dominion over death, and speaking from experience, that's really no fun.
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This is horrible. Everything's horrible and now Nico's questioning his abilities to take care of himself and he can't let him do this by himself no matter what. That's not what he promised. He promised Nico he'd do everything he could to be there when he spoke to Shuck and that, in his mind, includes this. It's scary. The idea terrifies him beyond belief because Nico's right. He doesn't know how to defend himself against ghosts, but he can't show him he's afraid of that.
But Loki's agreeing. Loki's agreeing and he peers up through his bangs at the god somewhat tentatively like he's waiting for the other shoe to drop. Loki's…not mad. Loki's also not entirely surprised which is a little bizarre.]
I'd really rather not piss off the Black Shuck. [There's a small, vaguely triumphant look at Nico in a way that suggests that he's won.] I'm coming with you. No excuses.
[But he looks back at Loki again and the question is clear in his expression. "Why? Why are you doing this? What do you know?"]
I'll figure something out. You can teach me. Something. Why else would Shuck ask me to come with you? ["Knucklehead." Strangely enough he relaxes a tiny bit even under Loki's ever-watchful eye, enough that he rolls his eyes at Nico again.] Why don't you trust me?
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[ he says, knowingly. that's also a hard lesson to learn there, bruh. ]
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Nico crosses his arms tightly against his chest. Hiro's right in that it's partially about trust, but it's not in the way he thinks.]
It's not just about trust. [Anything he says about his trust issues is...too personal, too private for him to feel comfortable talking about with Loki here. In his mind, it's not something to say to someone who he's just met, no matter their age or how wise they are. Some of it shows on his face, though he tries to keep his expression as even as possible.] The fact is, I messed up then and I messed up now by agreeing to let you come with me when I visited the Black Shuck. I got you involved and I'll be damned to the River Acheron if I let you get killed because of something I did.
[Nico's holding himself very tightly. He can't lose someone he's close to. Not again. His heart's been healing slowly this past year, but that doesn't mean it still isn't in a fragile state.]
Fact is, Hiro, there's a good possibility that if we get into trouble, there's no guarantee I can keep you safe. I could be too slow or something will happen that'll make me too late and that's going to be fatal, or you'll wind up in a fate worse than death. Then I'm going to have to explain to everyone who knew you what happened because I'm sure there are people who care about you more than enough to mourn your passing.
[And they wouldn't be the only one. Nico would carry that grief and guilt for the rest of his life if it ever happened.]
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You haven't lost yet.
[ his eyes go between the two of them. ]
Best to save words of guilt and mourning until the time that it passes, eh? We're headed head-first into the morbid. [ ha ha ha, Loki. ]
As far as the ghosty thing goes, I can jimmy something up. I do have some services to offer, being a god and all.
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Are you listening to yourself? [Whoops, let's not yell. Tone it done to "really displeased." He leans in closer, putting them so they're practically nose to nose as words tumble out faster than he can catch himself.] Are you listening to yourself? You can't--that's not fair, Nico, and you know it! You didn't get me involved. I got me involved because I told you I would. That's not how this works! You don't get to choose what is and isn't your fault. [His grip tightens further, but at least he's not trying to knock more sense into him.] I don't care. Whatever it is, I don't care because I'm going to make this work. I'm not giving up on you, okay?
[…and he stops because…because…well. He looks briefly stunned at the particular phrasing and he pulls his face back though his grip doesn't loosen.]
…there's a lot of stuff that can go wrong, but we're doing it anyway. Don't you get it? We're part of a team now. You can't be just watching out for my own safety. Who's going to look after you if I don't do this, too? [There's a deep breath as he finally calms down a little.] I knew there was a risk going to see Shuck with you and I did it anyway. You have to trust me. And yourself.
[It dawns on him that there's still an audience the moment he hears Loki chime in and he tilts his head back to look at him. There's…a very strange combination of emotions in his expression at the moment, a little too hard to pinpoint as just one. He knows he's only human and that that's his fatal flaw, but so what? The monarchs brought him here, too. He would get better.]
Loki's right. [Weirdly enough.] …and Nico's right, too, I guess. I don't have anything to fight ghosts with but I have a feeling you know exactly what we can use to help us.
[He knows he's going to owe Loki a very, very long explanation. That can come with time. This was more important.]
jesus fuck i'm so sorry for all of this introversion, but nico had a lot of feelings
He almost wants the other teenager to give up on him. On the other hand, Nico has a feeling that if Hiro does and proves him right, that everyone he wants to care about will leave him after finding out the entirety of who he is, all of that progress he's made on mending his heart might be completely undone. There's only so much he can take before he shatters so completely that he just can't heal from it. Tartarus did that once, brought him to the brink of shattering permanently, and, yes, there's something in Nico that will always be broken. Something that'll never be fixed for as long as he lives. But he's not shattered, not yet. He can still mend.
Somewhere along the way, though, without even realizing it, Hiro became one of those people Nico knows he can't lose like that. He didn't want that to happen, but, well, there's nothing he can really do about it now. He's dug his own grave, and he'll just have to hope it doesn't kill him in the end.
As for trusting himself...it's not that he doesn't. It's more that he knows that he can't always be there, even if it's the moment he's needed most. Nico's almost gotten Hazel killed once before. He's been pushed to exhaustion again and again, and couldn't help Reyna when she needed him most at points during the long trek back to Camp Half-Blood with the Athena Parthenos because of his constant pushing. It doesn't help that when Nico messes up, it's never pretty. It's usually traumatizing and might even get someone killed in the end. That's what it means to be a child of the Underworld.
None of those emotions and thoughts show on his face, though. This isn't the time nor place for that avalanche of emotional baggage. Not that Hiro's words don't penetrate. They do, they really, truly do. But that doesn't mean Hiro's convinced Nico.
So. He rolls his eyes in slight exasperation.]
You guess? You know I'm right. You have to get some kind of weapon blessed in order to actually kill anything undead. Of the two of us, I'm the only one with a natural ability to destroy anything undead with any weapon I use.
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[ Od's blood, Nico. there's a wave of his hand as if they had somehow forgotten that he was here entirely. (though it was quite good that he got the holes in that conversation. it gave him a decent understanding of what was going on here, and just how close Hiro had managed to get to Nico.) ]
I'm standing right here! It's as if I don't have a history of leading a bloody-mouthed undead valkyrior that will presently remain nameless!
[ pLEASE OKAY THANK YOU. ]
Why Loki, we never knew!
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Okay.
Nico just shrugs.]
I'm Greek, not Norse, so I wouldn't know. Sorry. If you can do it and nobody has to go ask someone to forge one....
[Then that'll make things a lot quicker, though that still doesn't mean Nico will take Hiro. He just won't say it.]
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Loki, how fast could you get me something that would work?
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Constructing a few spiritually-adept jars shouldn't be difficult.
[ if Hiro's going to do this, then Loki's going to help. while he can't be by Hiro's side for it (and he knows it'll just cause a spiral of defiance), he can definitely make himself useful. ]
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That'd help a lot. How many spirits could each jar hold?
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[ he points at Hiro. ] As long as the jar itself remains enchanted. [ then at Nico. ] We'll stick to one per jar, we don't want them to get crowded.