zerotohiro | Some Legends Are Told, Some Turn To Dust Or To Gold [CEREALIA INBOX]

... Let's have some pizza.

[She can't say she's super hungry, but at the same time she'd never turn down pizza anyway. Because.. well. Recovering!! Even though a lot of things are not good, Ruby has faith that eventually....]

It's okay though. It's... gonna be fine, even if it takes awhile.

We're all going to be okay.

[She's sure of this. Somehow--because she's gotta be.]

[He's not either, really. They'd come back to the apartment after returning from the dark place and all but crashed out. Hiro's wounds had been treated and he focused on drinking water before passing out more than anything. Probably why Tadashi ordered food for him in the first place.

Still. He can tolerate a piece or two and he drops on the couch with a little wince, pulling Ruby down with him even as he fluffs the blankets to create a slightly larger nest for the two of them.]

Your optimism never ceases to astounds me. [The tone's a little dry but judging by the fact he's wasting little time to lean into her he does appreciate it.] But seriously...everybody's okay?

[Some days, it's all she's got--but she holds onto it, and she thinks it works out okay. Optimism, and a whole lot of heroism.

So she grabs a piece of pizza as soon as she's flopped down on the couch beside him; she'll just tilt her head to rest it against his even as he leans against her, because...well, it's comfortable.]

Everyone's okay. We'll get through this.

[...]

Weiss is gonna be okay too, but... there's one more important person I have to check on for sure. To be 100% sure that everything's okay.

[He's grateful for it. One of the things he really does love about her and he's not sure how to express it without expressing a lot of feelings he doesn't quite understand yet. Still, it's a little strange and a little soothing to know that they've progressed to being this comfortable.

But he's thinking on it too much. Instead, he's grabbing a piece of pizza and tentatively biting off part of it, nodding along even as he shifts again.]

I mean...I don't mind if you've gotta bail in a little while to go check on somebody else. Or call, or whatever you need to do. We've got a lot of friends. [The point.

Hiro.]

[Hi...ro..........

She can't help it. She snorts a little under her breath, and then she's coughing a little because pizza cheese down her windpipe, but then when she's caught her breath, she just...has the most absurdly fond smile on her face despite herself. She's not really sure what she was expecting, but this...

It's just like Hiro, isn't it? To worry about other people, to be totally giving and selfless, and to not realize that the person she's talking about--]

I meant you, silly.

[She shifts to curl up a bit more on the couch, both because it's comfortable, and as a statement of intent. She isn't going anywhere.]

Didn't I say I wasn't going anywhere...? Just like this is fine, I think.

[If Hiro's ready to talk, they'll talk, and if not, they won't--but even so, it's a start and she's content with this.]

[He looks marginally bewildered when she starts to choke but she fixes that easily enough and he fixes with with yet another perplexed look.]

...oh. Right. [Blushing? Very lightly blushing. Is he ever going to get used to this? Probably much, much later. But okay...he can handle that. Curling in toward her and drawing the blanket-nest around them a little more even as he thinks of how to talk to her about everything that's happened.]

I'm really glad you don't listen to me when I say everything's fine.

[Blanket nests are the best, it's been decided. This is comfortable, she's...strangely close to Hiro and also totally alright with this, and it's warm. So she just relaxes further, resting her weight against him as he does the same, until they find some sort of blanket nest equilibrium.]

I mean... I know better by now. [She knows how you are, Hiro!!]

A lot of things happened there... and besides, I talked to Weiss.

[So there's like. One glaring issue already!! Yay, issues!]

You know me better than anybody else. [Which isn't entirely surprising anymore. Ruby never has to guess. On the other hand...he winces when she mentions Weiss's name, and not out of pain this time.]

You talked to Weiss. [Greeeeat.] Annnnd Weiss said?

[She does--because he's Hiro, and she's Ruby, and they've had the time to get to know each other That Well. She certainly doesn't regret it now, bundled up as cozily as they are now.]

Uh... lots of stuff, really.

[Like. A lot.]

But also that she tried to kill you.

[which is kind of a big deal.]

[Later when she does leave he'll have the startling realization that they've apparently ranked up in their social link. This is warm and safe and it's not a blanket fort but it's home. And it's with sudden clarity that he's realized that Ruby...sort of represents home now. Come back alive for Tadashi. Come back alive for Ruby. Do everything for them. Be everything for them because the world isn't enough for them.

So really, with that in mind it's a lot easier to talk to her than have the urge to run away and fix it himself like he would have even just a month ago.]

...yeeeeah. Yeah, that absolutely happened. [A lopsided grin follows.] Told you she didn't like me.

[She's just grateful that he's talking to her. It's with wry humor and a lot of deadpan and the best he can do, but she knows that that's his attempt to make things a little less painful all around. He's not trying to run away from it or hide from it--

They've come a long way, and she just sighs a little softly, sliding a bit to rest her cheek on his shoulder.]

Kiiiinda an understatement.

[...]

For what it's worth, she said she wouldn't have done it without the mask.

[... But it's still really concerning that she'd do it at all, and Ruby knows that hardly fixes anything.]

[As soon as she moves he's tilting his head enough to rest on hers and effectively trap her there. It's easier than having to look at her anyway.]

I know. [And he does know that. He knows the masks were making people crazy but Ruby's right. That hardly fixes anything.] But the masks didn't totally warp people's personalities, did they? [There's...something he's missing.]

...it was kinda scary, you know? I went back underground to make sure the area was clear and because I wanted to check out that altar again and she found me instead. And it seemed fine at first. Normal Weiss iciness. She said we had a lot to talk about and immediately drew her sword on me and started freaking out about how I stole you from her and that I thought I was better than her and some other stuff and she told me to prove it.

So. I tried. [He'd tried stopping her and when that didn't work, he stooped to her level.] She's a lot stronger than she lets on, and her glyphs aren't a joke. I never thought they were but it was hard to keep dodging her and eventually fighting back just pissed her off even more so she caught me off-guard and just...[He uses his free hand to gesture to the space below the left side of his ribs.]

She ran out of energy when I pulled off the mask. If I hadn't? Who knows if I'd even be here right now. [He's trying not to be dramatic about it but he also knows that Weiss had every full intention of ending it.] I'm not mad at her or anything, but...no offense? I'm not sure I want to see her again for a really long time.

I know.

[That's not a surprise at all, and honestly... She didn't come here to try to push them into making up. While it hurts that two of her favorite people are...at odds to this extent, she can't blame Hiro for it. He didn't do anything wrong. Weiss didn't entirely either, but even so, Hiro's the victim here.]

Weiss can be really scary, and you... [Hiro's a hero, but he's not a Huntsman. There's a difference.] ...you shouldn't have had to have dealt with that. At all. But... I'm just really glad you're okay.

[It could've gone so, so wrong, and she just shifts to capture one of his arms with hers, because when she thinks about how wrong it could've gone, she does want something to hold onto. To remind herself--he's fine. He's here, and breathing.]

That's what I'm worried about right now, I think... you not being okay. [The Weiss and Hiro relations can be handled later.]

Yeah. Me too. [It's just as grounding for him as it is for her. He shifts again because he's honestly just uncomfortable with all of his new injuries but he keeps Ruby close and closes a hand around her wrist somehow. This is still fine.

Of course, Ruby brings up the next point and he takes a deep breath, slowly releasing the sigh even as he tilts his head back to look at the ceiling.]

Things are...very much not okay, but can't we just sort of pretend they are? It's between me and Weiss and me and Tadashi and--[He frowns thoughtfully.] Is it weird that sometimes I'm worried about telling you too much? [Overloading her. Upsetting her. Driving her away. He's hoping he won't have to explain that part to her.]

[It's fine. She'll move with whatever he needs in order to stay comfortable--he's the one who's injured here, not her.]

... Hm.

[She has to think about that for a second, because honestly... she doesn't want to give a bad answer. Is it weird?]

No, I don't think it's weird. Not for you, I mean. I think that's kinda just how you are. As Just Hiro. [She gives him a bit of a smile at that--because even if their relationship has changed a bit, she doesn't think that that aspect has. Just Hiro and Just Ruby. A promise.]

But... at the same time, I wanna help! However I can, with whatever you want to share. So... yeah, I guess I don't really know the right answer here, but... if you do want to talk about it, I'm here. I don't mind.

I don't think there really is a right answer for this sorta thing. [But what Ruby's said is pretty close to being one, if the expression on his face is anything to go by. Just Ruby has always been one to listen to him and help him and he can only hope he can really return that favor someday. For now though, there's a lot he needs to dump out of his brain.]

Did you find that house of mirrors while we were out there?

Yeah.

[She knows exactly what place he's talking about; while her own visions weren't...terrible, seeing Naoki's had been pretty sad. She just frowns a little to herself, tilting her head slightly.]

You too? [Obviously. Something happened there, huh?]

Me too. [And he doesn't like it. He bites on his lip, fingers curling nervously against her skin as he thinks of the best way to phrase it.] You remember what I told you a while ago? Back when we were rebuilding the colony and we were hanging out and I told you about Callaghan and what happened. What I tried to do to him? [When he tried to murder the professor that had such little regard for Tadashi's life.] The house decided that would be the memory it showed everyone.

[So many people saw that memory and while he knows how most of them feel, there's one thing.] Including Tadashi.

[... Oh.

Oh. And the word escapes her softly, too, little more than a whisper:]

Oh.

[She gets it. Tadashi saw... Hiro at his worst, really. It makes her frown a little to herself--that's incredibly rude of it, it shouldn't have tormented him that way, she doesn't understand why everything always has to go so wrong--and then she tightens her grip on him as well.]

... How did he take it?

I mean...he's not here. And he was already gone when I woke up, and he won't really look at me right now so...[About as well as one can expect.] He tried to pull a weapon on me, too, because he didn't believe it was really me. Said that the real Hiro Hamada wouldn't try to kill somebody.

He's probably right. [It's definitely bothering him still days later.] I didn't get the chance to tell him everything else because it didn't seem like the right time to try. I never wanted him to find out like this.

[....]

I know. [How could anyone want someone important to them to find out this way? It's only...to be expected, really.] But... you're you, you know? "The real Hiro Hamada" is you... no matter what.

[So this nonsense of what he would or wouldn't do... it's silly, Ruby thinks.]

Because people do things sometimes that seem like good ideas, or what they have to do, and then they learn that they're not and they grow and they change, but they're still them.

You've always been Hiro, and... Hiro's who I like--a lot--so...I don't really know what I'm trying to say here but... [She doesn't like the "He's probably right" that was tacked on there.]

That's what I think.

[He doesn't say anything at first. He turns to face her, peering closely and leaning in until they're practically nose to nose as he simply looks at her and allows himself to really think on that.

Is that true? Is it true that he's still himself even when he's not acting like himself? More than anything he's aware of the shame and guilt that's usually associated with the fact he tried to kill someone, not to mention the anger that nothing changed and his own cacophony of other emotions tied to Tadashi and his death. Cerealia's had a way of messing things up for the two of them and yet Ruby makes sense. People do things that seem like good ideas. Tadashi ran into a fire because it seemed like a good idea, the thing he had to do. Hiro tried to avenge him because it seemed like a good idea, the thing he had to do. But of course one is more acceptable than the other.

So. He doesn't quite believe her but there's a strong sense of relief that she believes him and he drops his gaze and just sort of pushes his forehead against hers and stares down at their intertwined arms and hands.]

Don't be upset if I don't believe all of that right away, okay? I'm working on it. [There's a twitch of his lips like he's trying to grin but it's not working too well.] You'd think we'd have solved all of this by now. It's been months. [But then again, he supposes nobody thought they'd see Tadashi ever again and have to deal with the consequences.] ...it's stupid, but I just want him to know that even with all of that I'm still trying to make things right and I'm still trying to help people like he wanted. And now I'm not even sure he wants to listen to the rest of the story.

Have I ever mentioned Cerealia really, really sucks sometimes? Maybe I should ask Dipper more about his memory-erasing gun.

[Their faces are really close like this, but she doesn't flinch back when he looks at her like that. Instead, she meets his eyes, expression calm and certain. Much like with Tadashi, she knows that Hiro needs someone certain right now, someone who knows for sure. She doesn't know everything, of course--there are a lot of things she doesn't know. But she knows enough that she thinks she can be here for Hiro, and have faith in him.

At least until he can have more faith in himself.]

It's okay. [That he doesn't believe it all yet--that it might take a long time before he does.] That's what I'm here for. I'll just...believe in it until you do.

[His attempt at a smile falls flat, but hers doesn't; she smiles at him, and doesn't pull away.] I believe in you, so it's easy to believe in this too.

And... I know it has to be really hard, and it's probably impossible to know what to say, but... he's still your brother. He's your family! So... someday he'll wanna hear the rest of the story.

[She nudges him gently, still smiling, foreheads still pressed together.]

So no memory-erasing, okay? Then we'd just be back to the start!

[Confronting how he feels about things still scares him, truth be told. It makes him uncomfortable and it's hard to grasp and though he's getting better at understanding and interpreting his own emotions properly and expressing them in ways that make sense, he still doesn't like to dwell on them.

This is enough. Ruby believing is enough. Ruby being certain is enough.

Maybe someday Tadashi will hear the rest. Until then, he'll work on other parts. Believing things will be okay.

Still, he nudges right back and there's finally a true grin and a small bit of laughter at that.]

Like I could ever forget you, memory-eraser or not. Ever if I didn't remember though, we'd still be bonded and stuff. Hard to stay away from someone you feel like you're supposed to be with. [There's a thoughtful hum even as he allows his eyes to shut slightly. He's still a little tired. It's been a long day already and it's only just begun.] I'm really glad you're here. And I'm going to find a way that I'll always remember you. So...don't worry about that.

[That's... well, that's almost too much, really. But in a good way--she feels a little like she's going to melt into a puddle and wants to sink into a hole and wants to stay right here and never move, all at once. It's really a strange feeling, but--]

Hiro...

[That's...]

... That's really sappy.

[She grins then, relaxing as well; his eyes are closed and he finally seems to be feeling slightly better. Nothing's really resolved yet, but...sometimes just feeling better for a little bit is enough.]

True! But sappy. [But it'd be a lie to say that she doesn't like it even so, and that she totally feels the same way.]

Some Legends Are Told, Some Turn To Dust Or To Gold [CEREALIA INBOX]

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

(no subject)

(no subject)

(no subject)

(no subject)

(no subject)

(no subject)

(no subject)

(no subject)

(no subject)